Guest Articles >> Personal Development
Relationships can be the most beautiful things on the planet but when they end, they can have the most devastating effects on people. A bad relationship can not only make you feel lonely but it can also tamper with your self esteem. However, once it hits the highway, instead of wasting time and thinking what went wrong, you should focus more on getting over our ex.
When you feel that you have done enough to get over him, it’s time to put your efforts to the test. Here are a few ways to understand when you are totally over your ex:
You start thinking about other guys
If your relationship has ended for some time now, the sure shot way to understand whether you are over him or not is to evaluate your feelings for other guys. If you have started developing feelings for someone else or if you have started feeling interested in other people, it’s a sign that you are over him.
You enjoy going out with your friends
When a relationship ends, the pain of it sort of kills our social life. Usually, we don’t feel like going out or having fun because of the numerous emotions we experience. When you start getting over your ex, you will feel like going out and doing your share to have fun. There will be a renewed desire to bring some happiness back into your life.
You stop crying every time you see your exAnother sign to look out for is a gradual truce with your emotions. Usually, when people end relationships, even the mere sight of the ex can well up a series of emotions and lead people to tears. However, when you are completely over him, his sight will not evoke any tears or unmanageable emotions in you so you can actually feel at peace with yourself.
You can throw away all his gifts
A difficult thing to do at the end of a relationship is to get rid of the gifts and cards given by him. These objects will remind you of him and unless you are completely over him, you will find it difficult to get rid of them. Some people also burn the cards in vengeance but once you learn to simply part with it without any vengeful feelings, you are on your way to recovery!
His presence doesn’t fill you up with anger
When people are over someone, they stop feeling awkward and uneasy in their presence. Their exes stop existing for them and make no difference to their life whatsoever. If you have bumped into him recently and experienced zero emotions, especially those related to anger and revenge, you are definitely over him.
You stop looking for him wherever you go
When a relationship ends, it’s normal to look for him everywhere you go but when you are finally over him, you will stop waiting for his glimpse and you will stop hoping for him to suddenly come out from a car or sneak up on you from somewhere.
He doesn’t attract you in a sexual way
Relationships also involve a strong sexual chemistry and it’s difficult to get rid of it entirely. Exes often feel invisible sexual tension because of the bond they shared at a point of time. However, when you are completely over him, you will feel no such sexual attraction to him when you see him.
Everything stops reminding you of him
Relationships require two people to spend a lot of time together and do things together so it is more than natural to associate him with everything you do. Even the silliest things like school buses and diners can make you think about him thereby reminding you of the moments you shared with him. But once you are over him, you will subconsciously stop associating everything with your ex so when you do that, you are pretty much done with him.
You stop having imaginary conversations with him whenever you are alone
Many of us keep thinking of imaginary conversations about how we would react to show him that we have moved on in case he ever bumps into us while secretly hoping for it to happen. I have myself spent hours staying up in the night and thinking about things I’d talk to him about to show him how amazing my life has become after he went away but once I actually moved on, those conversations became history and I got very busy with my life. It happened to me and it will happen to you too.
You stop waiting for him to come back to you
Girls tend to wait for their exes to come back to them with the realization that they did something wrong. But in reality, that hardly happens. Maybe 2 out of every 10 girls get that. So the minute you learn to accept reality and stop worrying about such things, you will know that you have moved on.
You stop blaming yourself
We all have a tendency to blame ourselves for the end of a relationship but that’s not how it should be done. A relationship doesn’t end because of one person so there’s no need to reevaluate every word you said or everything you did and that’s a phase we all pass through. When you stop drowning yourself in blame and self hatred, you will know that you are over him.
You stop relating your life with every song/movie
Girls have a tendency to associate every movie with their life and after a break up. All romantic comedies and chick flicks start resembling their life stories. After a point of time, they see the bigger picture and stop doing that so if you are in past movie associations, you are over your ex.
You stop caring about what goes on in his life
The best way to know if your are over your ex is to think about whether or not you care about what goes on in his life. If you don’t, you are over him for sure!
This post is written by Avani Peterson and she works for corebloggers.com. Check out her recent post how to make your ex jealous.
Michaela says:
12-20-2013
I would like to know if there's a way to stop people around me from reminding me about my ex. Thanks.
sunny says:
12-20-2013
Hi Michaela,
If you follow the rules Avani so nicely compiled in this post, your ex will not be present in your mind so much. That means, he won't be present in other people's minds too. It's as simple as that.
Mia says:
04-20-2014
I never got rid of anything from my ex. I keep pictures, presents and I even keep some of the jewelry he gave me. It's no big deal anymore. The feelings are no longer there, so there's no problem at all.
The only thing I no longer have is his wedding ring. I think it's only fair that way. Thanks.